lately i've been experiencing a lot of internal resistant vibrations (ie. mental arguments with others, struggles with myself, worries popping up and me having to battle with them). and i realized that the more i fight with myself to think a different way, the bigger the resistance. the sooner i am able to say "ah, i'm being resistant. let's relax and know that i'm getting better and better all the time, and that i have so much time to change myself. there's no need to push myself so hard. there's no need to be frustrated. progress is happening." the sooner i feel more at ease.
i am making peace with the resistance. i know it's there. i know i have been choosing habits of thought that are resistant. but knowing that i can choose differently is all i need to tell myself in order to turn "downstream."
i'm enjoying the contrast around me. it shows me where i need to ease my own inner tensions. it shows me where i can grow. and it makes it easier to appreciate the goodness of life. i love where i am right now.
so, on a different note, anyone who hasn't yet seen Memento needs to go directly to the video store and rent it right now. it is amazing, and after watching it i felt like a different person. the plot is so intensely twisty up until the very end, that my brain literally had to work in a way it never had before. watch it. you'll love it.
i love you kids!